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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24718645">12 Hours</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/reherareh/pseuds/reherareh'>reherareh</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>ASTRO (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Break Up, Heartache, Hurt, M/M, Pain, Sad</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-06-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-06-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 01:08:11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,500</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24718645</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/reherareh/pseuds/reherareh</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>"I... I don't..." he let out a heavy sigh and closed his eyes for a moment. Then he forced himself to continue. He forced himself to say the most awful words that had ever been on the tip of his tongue.</p><p>"I don't love you anymore."</p><p>Even though his heart broke when he said it, it was true. He didn't love Sanha anymore.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Park Minhyuk | Rocky/Yoon Sanha</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>9</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>29</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>12 Hours</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Listening to 12 Hours by Astro inspired me to write chaky fluff and cuddles but this time listening to that beautiful song inspired me to write some simple sanhyuk angst.<br/>Hope you like it!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Hey, Sanha.”</p><p>Sanha turned around, butterflies already making themselves comfortable in his stomach at the sound of that soft, almost musical voice calling him by his name.</p><p>“Hi, Hyung!”</p><p>Sanha ran up to Rocky, sweeping him into a tight hug.</p><p>“I missed you,” Sanha whispered against the side of Rocky’s head, his voice muffled by Rocky’s short black hair.</p><p>Usually, Rocky would laugh and say, <cite>“I missed you too, silly,”</cite> but not now, not anymore. Instead, he sighed and mumbled how they saw each other a few hours ago. Sanha tried not to feel hurt at the small hint of annoyance in Rocky’s voice and just assumed Rocky was tired.</p><p>Sanha pulled back and smiled down at Rocky, who smiled back, a small smile that didn’t reach his beautiful eyes. Again, Sanha tried to ignore it and told himself Rocky was just tired.</p><p>“You’re back earlier tonight,” Sanha pointed out. He tried not to show too much of the relief and happiness he felt over his boyfriend finally coming back home early and not staying at the studio composing songs until two AM, the late hour that should get everyone to sleep.</p><p>Sanha had been wide awake when Rocky came back to the dorm. He had been wide awake when Rocky had crawled under the covers of his bed instead of Sanha’s just like every other night. Now, Sanha hadn’t felt the warmth of Rocky’s body pressed against him for a whole month. Neither one of them had said anything about the sudden change their routine took. The routine of them sleeping next to each other, in the sweet scent and safe arms of each other. Sanha thought that Rocky just didn’t want to wake him up when he came back so late, but a part of him knew it was something more, something else.</p><p>“We need to talk,” Rocky said with a low voice, a serious expression taking over his face and putting a dark shadow over it.</p><p>Sanha swallowed hard. He felt how his chest clenched. He struggled to get air down to his lungs, and a hard knot got tied around his heart. He had imagined this coming the past month and had woken up from nightmares of this moment every lonely night.</p><p>He nodded and followed Rocky quietly to their shared room with MJ. They sat down on their beds, facing each other. Sanha nervously chewed on his nails, waiting for Rocky to say something.</p><p>Finally, after several minutes of silence, Rocky spoke, moving to the point directly, “We both know we're not at our best right now and, to be honest... I don't think we'll ever get... better again..." Rocky paused and looked up, straight into Sanha’s eyes.</p><p>When Sanha saw guilt and shame stare into his soul, he knew what Rocky was about to say. He knew it was happening, yet he didn’t want to believe it and the moment Rocky said, “I think we should break up,” his mind was set in a haze. He couldn’t understand what had happened. He couldn’t understand why and how. He couldn’t understand things were turning out like this. He couldn’t understand this kind of ending would become the end of their story. And a part of him didn't want to understand. Yet, he asked with a small and weak voice, "W-why?"</p><p>Tears were already rolling down his cheeks, making his vision of the person he loved more than anything in the whole world blurry and unclear.</p><p>"I... I don't..." Rocky let out a heavy sigh and closed his eyes for a moment. Then, he continued. "I don't love you anymore."</p><p>Sanha never knew words could stab a person's heart so brutally and mercilessly. Everything hurt. His breathing hurt, the beating of his heart hurt, and most of all watching Rocky in front of him, so close yet so far away, hurt. It felt like everything fell apart, and the small world that they had built over the years together faded and disappeared into the quiet of the night outside to never exist again. His heart shattered into millions and millions of pieces over and over again when he heard those words replay in his mind too many times over the short span of a few seconds.</p><p>"I'm so sorry, Sanha."</p><p>Sanha couldn't stay there. He couldn't listen to Rocky's apology full of pity and only pity. Sanha ran out of the room and, for some reason, escaped into Eunwoo's. He quickly locked the door behind him, and then his knees buckled and he dropped to the floor with a loud cry.</p><p>Sanha couldn't see Eunwoo's face in front of him because of the tears that kept streaming down his face like a waterfall. He couldn't hear Eunwoo's worry and his questions. He couldn't even feel Eunwoo's hands on his shoulders, shaking him. All because of the numbness that had taken over his whole body down to his bones.</p><p>Sanha hugged himself and squeezed his eyes shut. He bit his trembling lip hard, trying to stop the ugly loud sobs from escaping his mouth but nothing seemed to work. So he just sat there, his back pressed against the door with arms around himself and his shaking body while the tears kept flowing down his face and neck. He couldn't think or move. All he could do was cry while the pain only got stronger and stronger, cutting though his heart every second. He could only feel how much everything hurt more and more.</p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>After hours of only tears and pain, Sanha was lifted to his feet and led to a bed. He was put under warm covers and squeezed between pillows. 

</p><p>Sanha was drained from tears. There was nothing left, not a single drop that he could cry out. But the pain, it remained the same.</p><p>"Rocky.... Rocky..." Sanha was whispering his name over and over again so quietly that for a moment he thought he was repeating the name in his head and not with his hoarse and dry voice.</p><p>The name Rocky would make one believe that the person who carried it was hard and cold like a rock, but not Park Minhyuk. He carried the name Rocky because he was dependable and strong like a rock. Sanha had admired him ever since he first met him and he would admire him forever.</p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>Sanha woke up to a bright light shining into Eunwoo's room through the window. He blinked a few times to adjust his eyes. Then, he remembered last night. The fresh pain went like an electrical shock through Sanha and then got settled inside of him, right in his broken heart.</p><p>Sanha let out a heavy sigh and put a pillow over his face. He wanted to fall asleep and never wake up again. It would be so much better than feeling the pain that corroded the dark void inside of him. It would be peaceful and quiet. He would be happy. </p><p>Sanha didn't want to do anything at all. He didn't want to do anything at all anymore. He didn't even feel hungry like he usually did the moment he woke up. It was like everything that made him a normal human being was gone. Gone together with Rocky, who had left him. This was all he was now: nothing. He was nothing without Rocky. </p><p>He had seen this coming. Sanha had seen their end in his nightmares too many times, yet he had never imagined he would feel this way. </p><p>Sanha wasn't sure when Rocky stopped loving him. Maybe when he stopped sleeping next to him or perhaps when the bright sparkling of his eyes every time he looked at Sanha got replaced with a dim light that barely shined through the darkness of the beauty his eyes held. Or maybe when his smile didn't look as cheerful and wide anymore when it was pointed at Sanha and never really reached Rocky's eyes. Rocky had surely stopped loving him when his kisses got so cold they sent shivers down Sanha's spine and when they had become so short, Sanha had barely gotten a chance to close his eyes before Rocky pulled away with a small frown between his eyebrows. </p><p>Sanha hadn't thought much about any of these things. He hadn't thought of why Rocky didn't back hug him so tightly anymore as he did so often Sanha had jokingly whined about how annoying it was when he loved the feeling of Rocky chest pressed so tightly against his back. He loved it so much he would never have gotten tired of it. Sanha hadn't thought about any of the signs that screamed out loud how their love was getting one-sided but he had still felt hurt when Rocky avoided him.</p><p>He had felt disappointed when Rocky didn't take notice of him when he walked out of the shower, barely dried off with only a towel around his waist. If Rocky hadn't stopped loving him, he would have looked up and watched every part of Sanha's body with a smirk on his face. He would have gotten up from his bed to press soft yet so damn sensual kisses onto Sanha's exposed back and chest, each one full of what Sanha always had thought was an endless love for him. An endless love like the one he felt for Rocky. </p><p>The pillow on top of Sanha's face was thrown aside, and the next second Eunwoo was leaning over him. He had dark shadows under his eyes and a deep frown between his eyebrows. </p><p>"Are you okay?" Eunwoo asked with a soft tone in his honey voice that made Sanha feel like crying again. He wanted to melt away like the honey in Eunwoo's voice. </p><p>Sanha shook his head, and Eunwoo sighed. He softly stroke away from the damp hair over Sanha's forehead and patted his head slowly. </p><p>"Do you want to talk about it?" </p><p>Sanha shook his head again. What was there to talk about? Rocky broke up with him because he didn't love him anymore. What was there to say? The only thing that existed now was broken pieces of love and pain. </p><p>"Jinjin Hyung has made breakfast. Want to go and eat?" </p><p>Sanha shook his head again, but Eunwoo didn't accept Sanha's denial this time. He carefully tried to pull Sanha up but instantly stopped when Sanha squeezed his eyes shut and groaned, his pale face wearing an expression that made him look like he was in too much pain to move one single centimeter.</p><p>"Sanha, what's wrong? Are you hurt? Where?" </p><p>Sanha didn't say anything. He just pushed Eunwoo's hands away with the little strength he had and then tried to raise his body on his own, but the same charge of pain shot through him. Sanha took a few deep breaths that made him feel like his lungs were stabbed with small spikes and then forced himself to get up anyway.</p><p>When he finally was standing up on his feet with a desperate grip on what he assumed was Eunwoo's shoulders while Eunwoo's hands were on his waist, helping him, he finally opened his eyes again. All he could see in front of him was Rocky leaving him. First how Rocky slowly distanced himself from Sanha and then how he finally left him for real. And it hurt badly. </p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>Everything that happened before Sanha finally stepped out of Eunwoo's room passed in a blur. The only thing he could think about was Rocky. Now how would he be able to see him without drowning in painful emotions all over again? How could his heart take in the sight of Rocky's handsome face and beautiful soft lips that used to kiss him so passionately and eagerly without breaking all over again? Not that there was much left of it to break, but still. How could Sanha listen to Rocky's voice without being reminded of how he sounded when he said he didn't love Sanha anymore?</p><p>Just as he and Eunwoo were about to walk into the kitchen, Moonbin and Rocky walked out. Moonbin's arm was resting over Rocky's shoulders, and they were both chuckling over something.</p><p>The moment Rocky saw Sanha he stopped dead in his tracks. When the bright smile on Rocky's face disappeared in an instant, Sanha could feel how it hurt somewhere, but no, everywhere. Not too long ago but yet a time that now felt like twelve years ago, he had been the person to put that bright smile on Rocky's face, but now he was the reason it disappeared. </p><p>The next second they just walked past and Rocky didn't look at Sanha again while Moonbin gave him a small smile. A sorry smile.</p><p>Sanha sighed. He didn't know what he was supposed to do anymore. He couldn't do well without Rocky, now that was for sure. Rocky, on the other hand, didn't seem to even feel any pity anymore. Rocky seemed relieved and happy that he had finally broken free from Sanha. If that thought didn't kill Sanha right then and there, nothing else ever would. His heart wouldn't ever break again because there wouldn't be anything left of it to break.</p><p>"Time, Sanha. Time will heal all wounds," Eunwoo whispered next to him.</p><p>Sanha didn't say anything, and he wasn't sure if he should allow himself to believe that because what Sanha thought he kind of understood now was how time was like a bus that didn't wait. Even if he regretted missing it, he kind of understood that it would leave and not come back in the end. But it didn't make sense. </p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>Breakfast, lunch, dinner. Sanha didn't eat anything. He just couldn't, and no matter how hard his Hyungs tried to talk to him and feed him, he didn't give in. He didn't say a word and didn't look at anyone. </p><p>He was lucky Rocky was avoiding him. He had caught up on what Sanha wanted and needed which were space and time alone. Sanha never would have thought that he one day would feel lucky over Rocky avoiding him, Rocky who was the man of his dreams and the man of his life, the man he loved so much. But nothing surprised Sanha anymore. He barely felt any other emotions than sadness, pain, and tiredness. </p><p>Now he was sitting with his back against the door in Eunwoo's room all alone, wondering what breakup was. After they had broken up a day had now passed. Probably even more than twelve hours but Sanha couldn't feel any sense of time. What was break up? Was it just regrets the past, full of this and that? Sanha didn't know. All he knew was that he didn't want to do anything at all anymore and he was missing Rocky so much it was driving him crazy.</p><p>It had been twelve hours since then but more series of twelve hours would come and go. And Sanha would have to live through every twelve-hour, somehow.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Why do I always make Sanha suffer????<br/>And why is my first Sanhyuk fanfic so angsty when it should have been a cute one????<br/>I don't know if you noticed but I tried to include the lyrics into the story. If you haven't already you definitely should check out the lyrics to 12 Hours. It's so beautiful and heartbreaking.<br/>Anyway, thanks for reading!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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